


the 11 days before Christmas (and the 1 day after)

by bapaldeul



Category: Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: Christmas AU, Exes meet again, Fluff, Happy Ending, M/M, MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE, One Shot, there's a little bit of angst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-24
Updated: 2017-12-24
Packaged: 2019-02-19 15:21:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,324
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13126443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bapaldeul/pseuds/bapaldeul
Summary: Jihoon meets Daniel again, and together they pick up the broken pieces they’d left behind years ago.





	the 11 days before Christmas (and the 1 day after)

**Author's Note:**

> Merry Christmas yall! <3
> 
> my present to you is a 11k oneshot nielwink fic, because what could be better than this right??
> 
> have a great holiday season!

_14 December_

 

There’s a loud, screeching voice that berates, “Happy winter break!” and Jihoon knows Park Woojin is the cause of it. He frowns even before he turns to face his friend, who is wrapped up in green scarf with mini Santas printed over it. Jihoon tries to suppress his laughter, then thinks back to all the times Woojin has made fun of his fashion sense, and doesn’t feel guilty for laughing at all.

Donghan snickers next to Jihoon, “That is one ugly scarf. Did you pick that up from the ‘rejects’ section in the mall?” 

On Jihoon’s other side is Jinyoung, who clutches his stomach hard in laughter. 

Woojin fakes a hurt expression, Jihoon knows they’re close enough to joke like this.

“Shut up, my grandmother bought this for me,” Woojin says, running his fingers over the scarf just to prove how much he treasures it. He then points to Jihoon’s scarf, “Besides, there’s someone here that deserves the spotlight in “Worst Dressed for Christmas” this year as well.”

Jihoon instinctively puts his hand over his scarf. He’s suddenly aware – he’s wearing _that_ scarf. The maroon one with yellow stripes at the end and with the Gryffindor logo printed just above the yellow stripes.

“I didn’t know you liked Harry Potter,” Jinyoung says, admiring his scarf.

“I don’t,” Jihoon says.

He didn’t even plan to wear this out today; it was probably sitting at the top of his drawer, and he’d taken it just because the temperature was in the negatives and he was running late for his morning class.

Otherwise, he would have _never_ worn this scarf out. In fact, he wonders why he hasn’t thrown it out yet.

“It’s a gift,” Jihoon mumbles, hoping his friends will take his lack of interest in this topic as a hint. He takes the scarf off and opts to hold it in his hand instead. His neck may freeze to death, but it’s way better than thinking about _him_.

“Why are you all getting your Christmas gifts now?” Donghan pouts, “Christmas is in 11 days.”

Jihoon gulps nervously, half from the mention of Christmas and the other half from the icy wind hitting him in the face. He should really put his scarf on now, or he’s going to catch a cold and he’s not going to be able to enjoy his holidays.

The four friends stop at the entrance gate of their school. 

“Well,” Woojin says, glancing at his friends. “I guess we’ll see each other tomorrow?”

Jihoon feels a smile tug on the end of his lips. “And the day after tomorrow?”

“And the day after tomorrow,” Jinyoung confirms.

Donghan sighs, “I hang out with you losers too much.”

The three turn to glare at Donghan, and he sighs, “Fine. And all the days after tomorrow. God, you guys are so disgusting. I’m leaving, can’t wait to rid myself of your ugly faces.”

They bid each other goodbye, all going in different directions. Jinyoung’s parents are probably here to pick him up. (That privileged asshole, Woojin would mutter under his breath.) Donghan takes the bus home, and Woojin is probably going to help out at his parent’s chicken store.

And Jihoon? Well, Jihoon likes to think walking home is therapeutic for him. The walk back is scenic, he even passes many shops on the way back. 

Not when the temperature is below zero, though, Jihoon does not appreciate the walk this time. His steps quicken, eager to get into his warm bed and sleep through the entire day. 

Donghan is right, they hang out with each other too much. They’ve planned to play in the snow tomorrow, then go skiing the next day after. They even have a Secret Santa event planned on Christmas day itself.

Which reminds Jihoon, he needs to go shopping for Woojin’s present soon, before he has to resort to turning up with a last minute shitty present and hoping to cover it up with an equally shitty explanation.

And Woojin is certainly not going to buy his cover up.

While he’s busy thinking about what to buy for his friend, a strong wind strikes Jihoon in the face. In the spur of the moment, the scarf in his hand escapes. The wind is strong, and carries the scarf a few meters away.

“Damn it,” Jihoon curses. This is why he hates winter.

 

That, and another reason too.

 

The wind hurts Jihoon’s eyes, and he has to squint while he goes to retrieve the scarf. (As much as he hates the scarf, he’s not going to leave it in the street so pathetically.)

Before Jihoon’s hand can reach out for the scarf, another hand comes into view and picks the scarf up for Jihoon.

“Thanks,” Jihoon says, smiling at the helpful stranger. 

That is, until he recognises the face. Those eyes, the same nose, the very two front teeth that Jihoon had fallen in love with three years ago. That very mouth that had whispered sweet nothings into his ears into the late of the night.

Although he recognises the face, his heart doesn’t believe it. 

 

It’s Kang Daniel.

 

“You dropped this,” Daniel says plainly, still holding the scarf out to Jihoon. 

When Jihoon doesn’t say anything, Daniel sighs and brushes the snow off the scarf and wraps it around Jihoon’s neck. It’s a little cold, from the snow – but he feels so much warmer.

“You need to wrap up,” Daniel chides, as if this is normal. He even adjusts the scarf to the way Jihoon likes it.

This meaning Daniel acting like he has the right to appear in front of Jihoon and pretend like nothing has ever happened between them.

“Park Jihoon, you haven’t changed. You’re still as careless as before. You could catch a cold, you know? Make sure to dress warmly next time and-“

“What are you doing here?”

Jihoon knows it’s not nice to cut someone off while they’re talking, much less when it’s the first conversation you’re having after three long years. 

“Me? I’m here to see you, of course.”

The way Daniel answers his question is so innocent, so prepared. And Jihoon hates it.

His mind is in a whirlwind of emotions right now, but he somehow manages to snap back to reality. He takes in a deep breath and looks Daniel straight in the eye.

“I don’t want to see you,” Jihoon replies. “Not now, not ever.”

Hurt registers on Daniel’s face. That’s another thing Jihoon hates – how easy Daniel makes it to read him. 

“Jihoon, I can explain-“

Jihoon swats Daniel’s arm away, almost like he’d predicted Daniel would attempt to touch him. Jihoon unwraps the scarf from his neck and throws it into Daniel’s arms.

“And you can take your scarf with you. You appeared just in time, I was about to throw it away.”

It hurts Jihoon to see the scarf leave his arms. It was no accident that he hasn’t thrown it out all these years. He knows he misses the smell of Daniel. The scarf was a reminder that Daniel did once exist in his life.

“Don’t you want to talk?” Daniel says, holding the scarf helplessly in his hands.

“No,” Jihoon answers. “Don’t look me up again.”

His eyes are moist when he turns away, and he chooses to blame it on the wind. Jihoon trudges on, neck freezing and heart broken for the fourth winter holiday in a row.

 

_15 December_

 

After a night’s sleep, Jihoon manages to convince himself that whatever happened with Daniel the day before was a bad dream, and puts it behind him. 

He’s not going to let this ruin his Christmas – and he has a snowball fight to attend to.

When he hears the knock on his door, he thinks it’s Donghan or Woojin; being as impatient as ever and wanting Jihoon to get out of the house as soon as possible. 

“Alright, I’m coming,” Jihoon shouts in respond to the increasingly frequent knocks on his door.

He almost rips the door open, just to throw off whoever is knocking on the other side. He hopes it’s Woojin; that little shit needs to taste some of his own medicine one day.

The person knocking does jump back in shock – but it’s not Woojin.

“Kang Daniel?”

As soon as Daniel manages to calm himself down from the shock, he says, “Oh, so you do still stay here. I was worried you moved.”

“Now I wish I did,” Jihoon says, making sure Daniel hears him. “What are you doing here?”

Jihoon is thankful that he’s the only one at home. His parents are out at work, and his sister is out with her friends as well. It’d be incredibly awkward trying to explain to his family members why he’s being so cold towards lovely Kang Daniel. 

“Has Jina been doing well?” Daniel says, peering into the house, completely ignoring Jihoon’s question.

“That’s none of your business now,” Jihoon says, cringing at the word ‘now’. “Please leave, and stop looking me up.”

Jihoon starts to close his door but Daniel manages to squeeze his body in between the door. Jihoon notices that he has gotten significantly taller, and shoulders broader as well. Not that it matters anymore.

“Hey,” Daniel says, in a lower tone, more serious.

“Can we talk? I have so many things I want to say to you.”

Jihoon almost instinctively answers ‘yes’. But he bites back his tongue. 

“Maybe you should have said all of that before you left.”

“I didn’t want to-“ Daniel starts to argue, then stops himself. He sighs, and tries again, “Please, baby?”

Jihoon almost cries when the familiar endearing name slips out from Daniel’s mouth. Daniel himself looks shocked at his own words, “I- I didn’t mean to say that so quickly. I’ve just missed you so damn much. I’m sorry.”

Jihoon holds his hand out to stop Daniel from continuing, knowing fully well that Daniel could ramble on for hours if he had to.

“Stop apologizing,” Jihoon snaps. “I’ve had enough. I have somewhere to be, so I would appreciate it if you left. And don’t come back.”

Daniel lets out another frustrated sigh as he runs his fingers through his hair. Jihoon remembers how much he’d liked doing that as well.

“Fine,” Daniel answers, giving in to Jihoon. 

(He always gives in to Jihoon.)

“Just take this,” Daniel adds on, and holds out the same Gryffindor scarf Jihoon had left with him the previous day.

“I don’t want it,” Jihoon says, crossing his arms. 

“Stop being so stubborn,” Daniel says through his clenched teeth, and throws the scarf behind Jihoon. It lands perfectly on the sofa. “I bought this for you, so keep it.”

Jihoon doesn’t like arguing with Daniel – he knows how stubborn the other boy can get as well. So he just waits for Daniel to let himself out.

“Jihoon?”

He looks up to match Daniel’s eyes. He can’t help it; he’s never been able to resist Daniel.

“I was serious about you then. And I’m serious about you now. I’m also serious about cleaning up the mess I made. Call me, okay? I really miss you.”

Jihoon doesn’t answer; he knows he’s not going to call Daniel back. (Even if he’s never had the heart to delete his number after all these years.) Instead, he chooses to slam the door shut. Daniel waits outside for a few minutes, then walks away.

 

“You’re late,” Donghan says when Jihoon meets his three friends at the town square. 

“I’m sorry, I had some things to sort out at home,” Jihoon says bitterly, the memory of Daniel still lingering in his mind. He forces himself to smile; he’s not going to bring down the atmosphere of a good day just because he hasn’t had the best morning.

Donghan just waves him off dismissively, “Forget it, let’s just start playing. The snow is pouring today, it’s perfect for a snowball fight.”

And perfect it is. They play rock paper scissors, and Jihoon lands up in Woojin’s team. The snow reaches up to their ankles, and the melodious sounds of boots running across the soft snow makes Jihoon smile again. 

They end their game by burying Woojin in a pile of snow, because he’d cheated. 

“Let’s go in before we freeze,” Donghan says, dusting his gloves. Jinyoung and Jihoon agree, and run towards the nearby café in search of warmth and hot chocolates.

“Hey! Don’t leave me here to die!” Woojin’s voice echoes throughout the entire town square.

 

Jihoon ends up paying for all their hot chocolates, because his team lost the snowball fight, and Woojin had “forgotten to bring his wallet”. The sweet drink brings another smile to his lips, and he closes his eyes to relish the warm liquid travelling down to his stomach.

“This is what winter is all about,” Donghan says to no one in particular.

“You guys won’t believe who I saw this morning,” Woojin says, putting his cup of hot chocolate down to get the attention of his friends.

“Kang Daniel,” is all Woojin says for Donghan and Jinyoung to erupt in simultaneous “oooohs” and for Jihoon to choke on his hot chocolate. It’s all thanks to Jinyoung who kindly pats Jihoon’s back that he doesn’t die right there and then.

“You mean _mega hunk senior_ back in high school that Jihoon had a crush on for the longest time?” Donghan reiterates and Jihoon feels his face go red.

“Please never use mega hunk to describe anyone else ever again,” Jihoon sighs, putting his hot chocolate down to reduce the risk of choking again.

“It’s true,” Jinyoung agrees. “You were so whipped for him. I haven’t seen him for three years, where has he been?”

Jihoon’s heart drops at the mention of Daniel disappearing for three years. He better than anyone else knows how long three years can feel when you’re missing someone. 

Woojin shrugs, “I don’t know. But damn, he has gotten even hotter, if that’s even possible. I didn’t get to say hello, he was rushing elsewhere.”

“Good,” Jihoon mutters under his breath. He wouldn’t know how to handle his friends and Kang Daniel at the same time. 

Donghan nudges Jihoon’s shoulder, “Aren’t you happy to hear this? I mean, I was pretty sure he had a thing for you as well.”

A thing isn’t what Jihoon would exactly describe their relationship to be. They had been so much more, in Jihoon’s eyes. Apparently to Daniel, their “thing” meant nothing.

“Drop it,” Jihoon warns his friends. “I’m over him. Let’s go do something else.”

 

_16 December_

 

Jihoon makes the extra effort to be early the next day. They’re supposed to go ice skating at the town’s frozen river. The temperature is again, below zero today so Jihoon decides he needs a hot chocolate to get through the day.

The café door’s bell rings as Donghan and Woojin barge into the café, laughing heartily between themselves.

“What’s so funny?” Jihoon asks when they settle down. The two exchange a knowing gaze and explode in a fit of giggles again, neither having the will to stop and explain to Jihoon what was so funny.

“Ugh. This is why Jinyoung needs to be here,” Jihoon sighs to himself. At the very least, Jinyoung provides some sort of solace from his two other friends. “Where is Jinyoung, anyway?”

“Jinyoung isn’t coming,” Woojin says. 

“He’s in bed with a cold,” Donghan adds, looking way too happy to deliver the news of their friend being sick.

“Damn,” Jihoon curses. “I guess we played too long in the snow yesterday. It’s not going to be fun with just the three of us.”

What Jihoon really means is that he doesn’t want to spend a full day with only Woojin and Donghan, because he already knows it’s going to be extra exhausting putting up with Woojin’s endless burst of energy and Donghan’s endless snarky comments.

“Oh, you won’t have to worry about that,” Donghan smiles sweetly.

“We got you covered,” Woojin continues.

Before Jihoon can ask his friends to stop talking in riddles, he notices a familiar tall figure entering the café and his heart immediately drops.

Daniel smiles at the waitress who greets him, and heads straight to their table, taking the empty seat next to Jihoon (that was meant for Jinyoung).

Jihoon is quick witted, and between the knowing glances that his two friends exchange and Daniel’s confused but innocent smile, he knows he’s been set up.

“I’m leaving,” Jihoon announces and stands up to leave even though his hot chocolate is only half-finished.

“Nope,” Donghan says, holding Jihoon’s arm down and forces him to sit back down again. “You said you’d come ice skating with us today, so don’t back out on us.”

“Plus,” Woojin chips in, “I spent a good amount of effort convincing Daniel hyung to come today. Let’s all have some innocent fun, okay?”

Innocent fun my foot, Jihoon thinks to himself and angrily sips his drink. He refuses to look at Daniel, although he’s sure the other is practically baring holes into his face.

“I need a drink,” Woojin says very unnaturally. 

“Me too!” Donghan stands up to follow Woojin to the counter as well.

Using the word awkward to explain the situation right now is an understatement. Jihoon doesn’t know how to start a conversation; or if should even start one.

Fortunately, or unfortunately, Daniel says something first.

“I didn’t know you’d be here,” he confesses, looking down at his hands and no longer at Jihoon. “Woojin didn’t say anything about you. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable, I can leave if you want.”

“Forget it,” Jihoon snaps, more angry at his friends for inviting Daniel along without asking him first. “They’re just going to be on my ass the entire holiday if you leave now so stay.”

Daniel isn’t expecting that answer, and looks up to smile at Jihoon. Even after three years, Daniel’s smile still manages to send butterflies into Jihoon’s stomach.

“Thank you,” he says. “You dressed warmly today, I’m glad.”

Although Jihoon knows that Kang Daniel is just a big puppy who means well, the anger starts to bubble in his stomach.

“Don’t do that,” he warns. “Don’t act like you care about me. If you really did you wouldn’t have left me back then. Let’s just get through today, and we’ll never have to see each other again.”

Donghan and Woojin return to their table, and Jihoon takes that as a cue to stand up and pull his two friends towards the door.

“I haven’t even started-“ Woojin protests.

“I don’t care,” Jihoon replies. 

He just wants this day to pass as quickly as possible.

 

There are already quite a number of people skating at the frozen river when they arrive, and Jihoon is thankful for that. With his luck, he’ll be able to lose Daniel in the crowd and there’s no way he’s going to have to carry another conversation with him.

After renting their skates, Jihoon sets off first.

“Wait up!” he hears Woojin call out from behind. He doesn’t wait for his friends. After all, he’s still pissed at them.

Jihoon can’t help but sneak a glance at Daniel once in a while though. At first, he’s chatting happily with Woojin and Donghan, and a pang of jealously hits him in the chest. 

He shouldn’t even be jealous, Jihoon thinks. Daniel is nothing to him now.

However, he starts to smile when he sees Daniel helping a little girl up from where she’d fallen. Daniel holds the little girls hand and helps her stand up again. 

At the very least, he’d fallen in love with a boy with a golden heart. 

(Although it was hard to see that through the heartbreak Daniel had given to him.)

Suddenly, someone brushes past Jihoon. Hard. 

Jihoon doesn’t lose his balance easily, he’s been skating for as long as he remembers. However, he’s been so caught up with observing Daniel that he doesn’t have the time to react, and falls hard onto the ground.

There’s no mistaking Daniel’s loud voice that shouts, “Jihoon!” when he falls. In just a few seconds, he feels someone pulling him up.

It’s Daniel, of course. 

“You okay?” Daniel asks, face ridden with concern as he checks for any injuries. “Answer me!”

“Relax,” Jihoon finally says. “I’m not dying.”

Daniel doesn’t react to Jihoon’s sarcasm. Instead, he stands up and holds out both of his hands.

“Hold my hand,” Daniel says.

“I don’t want to.”

“Is this really the time to be having this conversation?” Daniel asks, exasperated. 

“It’s the perfect time-“

Before Jihoon can continue, Daniel shakes his head and bends down to hoist Jihoon up by wrapping one arm around his waist and another holding his hand. 

“What are you doing?” Jihoon asks. Daniel is so, so close to him right now. His body remembers how nice it feels to be held by Daniel.

“Why…” Daniel stops himself, as if hesitating as to whether he should ask this question.

 

“Why are you pushing me away?”

 

_Isn’t it obvious? I don’t want to fall in love with you again._

 

Their skating plans are cut short, because it’s getting crowded and Jihoon can’t skate without stopping every few seconds. Instead, they crowd into a nearby curry restaurant to fill their hungry stomachs. If Jihoon weren’t starving, he would have been aware of how near he and Daniel were squished together in a booth.

“What are we doing tomorrow?” Donghan asks, his face stuffed with rice.

“My mom’s making gingerbread man cookies,” Woojin says. “She says you guys can come if you want to help out. Including you, Daniel hyung.”

With the mention of Daniel possibly going, Jihoon wants to say that he’s made other plans. 

But Woojin’s mother’s cookies are to die for. And they only come once a year.

“That sounds wonderful,” Daniel says.

Jihoon knows how much Daniel adores his Christmas goodies. He’d once raided Jihoon’s house of all their candy canes and log cakes. The Daniel he’d fallen in love with had an insatiable sweet tooth, as Jihoon likes to fondly remember.

“I’ll think about it,” Jihoon says. “I gotta go. Mom’s making dinner.”

Donghan and Woojin hum in agreement and wave goodbye to their friend.

“See you tomorrow, Jihoon,” Daniel says.

Jihoon doesn’t reply. How does Daniel even know he’s going to show up tomorrow? 

 

_17 December_

 

Jihoon does show up. 

That is, after 3 hours of internal conflict. 2 in his room, and another one on the streets. Finally, he decides that a certain Kang Daniel is not going to ruin his chance at stuffing his face with Mrs Park’s heavenly cookies and walks into the house.

“And there he is,” Woojin announces sarcastically. “Did you get stuck on the toilet bowl this morning? You missed the preparation part.”

“It’s fine,” Jihoon says, avoiding having to look at Daniel. He turns to greet Woojin’s mother instead, “After all, I’m here just for the tasting part.”

“Freeloader,” Woojin mutters under his breath.

Jihoon also greets Jinyoung, who looks anything like a boy who’s supposed to be recovering from a cold.

“Don’t you have a cold?” Jihoon nudges his friend.

At first, Jinyoung looks completely clueless. He then catches a glare from Donghan and pretends to cough, “Oh, yeah. Cold- I feel a little better today, I guess.”

His friends are losers, Jihoon confirms that again today.

The heavenly cinnamon smell from the oven helps Jihoon ignore Jinyoung’s absolute lack of ability to lie and feels himself get excited.

When Donghan fishes the cookies out of the oven, Jihoon grabs at the decorations.

“Don’t take everything!” Woojin chides. “We’re doing this together.”

The 5 boys gather around the kitchen counter and start with the decorating. Jihoon chooses to ignore Daniel, who has naturally taken a seat beside him.

Jihoon likes to think that he’s not too bad at art. So why is it that his gingerbread man looks nothing like a gingerbread man? He presses hard on the icing bottle – which is a huge mistake, because now the gingerbread man has uneven shaped eyes.

Beside him, Daniel chuckles.

“What?” he snaps.

“Nothing,” Daniel says, smiling to himself. “Your gingerbread man looks… cute.”

“Cute my ass,” Donghan mutters. 

“Like you could do any better,” Jihoon says before he can stop himself. 

Bickering with Daniel comes so naturally to him, and he recognises the same cheeky smile on Daniel’s face that tells him the same.

“I can do way better,” Daniel replies, showing his finished cookies to Jihoon. And he has to admit, they look as good as the ones that are sold in bakeries. 

“Show-off,” Jihoon sighs, pressing angrily on the icing again.

“You’re doing it wrong,” Daniel whines, “Let me show you.”

Without any warning, Daniel holds Jihoon’s right hand and carefully guides him on the right amount of pressure to apply. Just like magic, the gingerbread man’s buttons come out perfect.

“See?” Daniel smiles proudly.

“You are such a show-off, Kang Daniel,” Jihoon reiterates. 

Bending down to whisper in his ear, Daniel says, “You like it, though.”

Jihoon feels his face grow hot, and he’s sure his face is in some embarrassing shade of red. 

“For the love of single people, please shut up,” Jihoon hears Woojin muttering under his breath. 

Jihoon doesn’t have the strength to argue that everyone at the table is a single man.

 

Jihoon doesn’t know how he’d gotten himself in this situation. Most of all, he’d like to blame it on Woojin’s mother – she was the one who suggested that they go and hand out the gingerbread man cookies they made to the neighbours. 

(She’d said that Jihoon could bring back a box of cookies for himself if he’d agreed.)

And by _pure coincidence_ , Jihoon had been paired up with Daniel.

“Have fun, lovebirds!” Woojin calls out and Donghan whistles as they walk the opposite way. 

“We are not lovebirds!” Jihoon says through clenched teeth and holds the cookies closer to his chest to make sure that they don’t get cold.

“Let me hold those for you,” Daniel offers and Jihoon refuses.

“No, I’m holding these. And you’re going to give them out,” Jihoon says.

“I don’t want to,” Daniel complains, stomping his foot childishly on the floor. “I’m shy.”

“Since you’re so good at using your smile to charm people, you’re doing it,” Jihoon insists. 

It was supposed to be a spiteful comment, but being the slow-witted boy that Kang Daniel is, he doesn’t take it that way, Instead, he laughs, “You would know.”

Together, they give out cookies to a few families and finally stop at Jihoon’s house. 

“I’ll bring it in myself,” Jihoon tells Daniel. “You can leave.”

Daniel pouts, which makes Jihoon want to slap it off his face. “Why are you always asking me to leave?”

Jihoon rolls his eyes, even though he can feel some of Daniel’s magic rubbing off him. 

“This is my house, and you are not allowed inside.”

Before Daniel can protest, there’s a loud voice, “Daniel! Is that you?”

Jihoon groans when he sees Daniel smiling brightly – he knows it’s over when his family sees Daniel. So it doesn’t come as a shock to Jihoon when his mother bounds down the stairs to envelope Daniel in a hug. 

She cups Daniel’s face in her hands and Jihoon almost gags. She’s never done that to him, so why Daniel?

“Where have you been? It’s been three years, Jihoon told us you left to America to study,” his mother starts to blabber, not giving Daniel a chance to say anything in return.

“And you left without saying goodbye as well!” Jihoon’s mother reiterates. 

Yeah, you did, Jihoon thinks bitterly to himself. 

“I’m so sorry, Mrs Park,” Daniel says. “I’m back now, aren’t I?”

Jihoon wonders how Daniel can act like nothing has happened; like the three years meant nothing to Jihoon. As if he could actually come into Jihoon’s life so easily again.

“I’m glad you’re back,” his mother gushes. She then wears a knowing smile on her face that Jihoon can tell that she has one of her ‘genius’ ideas again. “You should stay for dinner! Jihoon would love that, wouldn’t you?”

No, Jihoon would not love that. Especially since it’s hard to explain to his family what exactly had transpired between Daniel and him three years ago.

“Actually,” Jihoon butts in. “Daniel has somewhere to be for dinner, don’t you?”

Jihoon sends Daniel a glare that says, “You better say yes.”

Finally, Daniel nods and replies, “He’s right. I have somewhere to be tonight.” Jihoon lets out a sigh of relief, his day could have turned from bad to worse if Daniel stayed for dinner.

“What a shame,” his mother says. “What are you doing tomorrow?”

Jihoon’s mother is persistent, and Daniel knows this already.

“Nothing much, I’m going shopping for some of the supplies my family needs for Christmas.”

“That’s really nice of you. Which reminds me I have a list of things I need to get for Christmas as well. Jihoon dear, would you please accompany Daniel and get me a few items?”

No, is what Jihoon thinks at first. Next, he tries thinking of a way out but unfortunately, his friends do not have any plans tomorrow. (Blame Donghan for saying he’d wanted to spend the entire day sleeping instead.)

“That sounds great!” Daniel exclaims. 

“Yes!” Jihoon’s mother agrees, matching Daniel’s enthusiasm. “You two could use some time to catch up as well.”

 _Catch up_ , Jihoon scoffs. They have nothing to catch up on.

Still, he doesn’t have the heart to say no to his mother. And he’s not going to explain why he doesn’t want to go with Daniel. So he forces a smile and says, “Yeah, sure.”

“It’s cold here, you better leave,” Jihoon’s mother says. “And drop by for dinner one day!”

“I will!” Daniel replies, waving goodbye to Jihoon, which he ignores. “See you tomorrow, Jihoon!”

When they return inside, Jihoon bites back his tongue as his mother starts telling his father all about how Daniel is back. His father responds positively, and tells Jihoon to invite Daniel over for dinner soon. 

If only Daniel hadn’t left that Christmas, Jihoon would have to force a smile and lie by saying “Yes.”

 

_18 December_

 

Contrary to Jihoon’s unwillingness to spend an entire day alone with Daniel, he spends the longest time choosing what to wear for the day. It shouldn’t really matter what he wears inside, he’s going to cover up with a coat anyway.

_Still._

He hears laughter coming from downstairs, and decides to throw on his favourite yellow padded coat before rushing out of his room.

Jihoon isn’t prepared to see his father slinging an arm over Daniel’s shoulder in his living room. 

“There he is,” his father says, smiling at Daniel then at Jihoon. “Always late.”

“It’s fine,” Daniel replies good-naturedly. “I’ve gotten used to it.”

Jihoon isn’t up for family bonding this early in the morning, so he drags Daniel out the door by his arm before he can get too chummy. 

“Have a good day, boys!” his father calls out after them.

Once Jihoon closes the door behind him, Daniel runs his fingers over Jihoon’s jacket, smiling, “You still have this jacket?”

“Of course,” Jihoon huffs, walking ahead of Daniel. “What? You’re going to complain that it’s too bright for your liking?”

No matter how fast Jihoon walks, Daniel manages to match his pace. 

“I like it very much, actually,” Daniel confesses. “I just said I didn’t like it to get a reaction out of you back then.”

There’s something about Daniel talking about the old times that irks Jihoon to no end, so he doesn’t offer anything in response and they continue walking in silence.

Somehow, they manage to get most of the items on their list without hitting any major roadblocks. Jihoon tries to avoid conversation by moving at a fast pace, only occasionally asking Daniel if he was done picking the colour of the lights he wanted.

“Just get the white ones,” Jihoon says, tapping his foot impatiently on the ground as Daniel crouches on the ground, white fairy lights in one hand and red and green ones in another.

“I can’t decide,” Daniel whines. “Both are so pretty.”

“We don’t have the time for this,” Jihoon replies, willing himself to not lose his temper in the middle of the shop.

“Stop rushing me!” Daniel sighs, gaze shifting between the two choices in his hands.

“I’m not!” Jihoon argues back. “You’ve been stuck choosing for the past 10 minutes!”

“Fine!” Daniel says, looking up at Jihoon. “You choose. Which one do you like better?”

“White,” Jihoon says before turning away, face red when he sees a few people staring at the both of them. It’s a funny sight to others, Jihoon understands.

“I’ll get the white ones then,” Daniel announces, smiling proudly as he hands the lights over to the cashier. 

Finally, the two leave the decorations shop and Jihoon can feel his stomach rumbling. He hadn’t planned to spend such a long time with Daniel; the other man just took too long to decide sometimes. He still has a few things to get before he can leave, and he’s not going to survive on an empty stomach.

Jihoon tugs on Daniel’s jacket sleeve. When Daniel turns around to look at him, all he says is, “I’m hungry.”

“Oh my god, it’s past lunchtime. I totally forgot. I’m sorry- where do you want to eat?” Daniel looks flustered at Jihoon’s sudden announcement and looks around frantically for a food joint as if Jihoon is going to faint if he doesn’t get food into his stomach this instant.

“Chicken,” Jihoon answers, knowing he’s going to have to stand in the cold for another half an hour if he lets Daniel makes the decision.

“Okay,” Daniel nods, leading Jihoon to a nearby chicken joint down the road.

 

Jihoon glances at the bones Daniel has left behind. Although he doesn’t want to seem petty; he doesn’t like seeing anyone leaving meat left on the bone, including the cartilage. 

“Don’t waste your food,” Jihoon says pointedly at Daniel.

At first, Daniel looks confused, like he doesn’t know what Jihoon is talking about. He then follows Jihoon’s gaze to his chicken bones and smiles.

“You haven’t changed. Still nagging at me to finish my chicken.”

Jihoon purses his lips, he wants to say something cutting back to Daniel, but can’t bring himself to. 

“You haven’t changed either.”

Jihoon continues to chew on his chicken in spite of Daniel staring at him.

Finally, he can’t take it anymore.

“Stop staring,” Jihoon says, his eyes still on his chicken. “Finish your food and let’s go.”

“Jihoon.”

“What.”

“Can you look at me?”

Jihoon puts his chicken down and looks at Daniel straight in the eye. His heart pounds wildly against his chest, no matter how hard he tries to suppress it. 

“I’m serious about us,” Daniel says. “I came back to fix the mess I made.”

“Don’t you think it’s too late for that?” Jihoon fires back. “I waited three god damn years- you didn’t even call, or text me once. When I woke up that morning, you were gone-“

Jihoon stops talking; it’s too much to remember.

How could he ever forget? The feeling of waking up and expecting someone to be lying beside you but finding an empty space instead.

“I know,” Daniel nods. “It’s my fault. I was scared of calling, I was scared you had moved on. I was afraid to face the reality.”

“How could I move on?” Jihoon says, his voice all choked up. “I was so in love with you.”

He’s not going to cry while holding onto a chicken drumstick; it’s too pathetic to even fathom. 

 

“I am still in love with you.”

 

Jihoon shakes his head in response to Daniel’s confession. “How could you leave me alone if you loved me?”

Daniel falls silent; no excuses left to use. He slumps into his chair.

Without warning, a tear falls down Daniel’s cheek. He isn’t fast enough to wipe it away with his hands.

“Are you crying?” Jihoon whispers, his voice shaky.

“No,” Daniel protests, as another tear rolls down. 

Jihoon has never seen Daniel cry, expect for that one time they’d decided to watch ‘Me Before You’, where he learnt that his boyfriend (ex-boyfriend) was a hopeless romantic.

“Stop crying,” Jihoon says, looking away as he feels his eyes start to well up with tears. “You’re making me cry, you big, goofy idiot.”

Although tears are rolling at un uncontrollable rate down Daniel’s cheeks now, he manages a low laugh.

“Oh my god. I haven’t heard anyone call me ‘Big, goofy idiot’ in years.”

“Because I’m the only one that puts up with all of your shit,” Jihoon says back, reaching for a paper towel to dry his tears.

This is so embarrassing, to be crying with his ex in a chicken restaurant. 

It’s funny too, which sends Jihoon into a fit of giggles.

“Don’t-“ Daniel chuckles as well. “Don’t laugh. This is supposed to be sad.”

“I can’t be sad if you keep crying like a baby.”

“Like you aren’t.”

When the two finally manage to calm down (from both the crying and laughing), Daniel takes in a deep breath.

“Can you see now? I’m so super in love with you. It pains me to see that you don’t believe me.”

Jihoon does believe Daniel, his tears are proof. But he isn’t ready to dive right into the very relationship that left him heart-broken three years ago just yet.

“I know,” Jihoon nods slowly. “Can we just take things slow? Three years without you is a lot to take in right now.”

Daniel finally smiles brightly and takes Jihoon’s hands in his, “Of course. This is okay, right?”

Daniel’s hands are warm, especially when the weather outside is freezing. Slowly, Jihoon’s insides start to bubble with warmth as well. 

“Okay. This is okay.”

 

_19 December_

 

Jihoon realises that he and Daniel have a lot of broken pieces to pick up from years ago. It’s not easy for him to completely accept Daniel again just yet, but he’s trying. He’s trying to look at things from Daniel’s perspective from three years ago, but it’s not easy.

He doesn’t want to say anything to his friends just yet. Besides, Daniel and him aren’t in a relationship yet, Jihoon was just giving him another chance.

The change in Jihoon’s behaviour doesn’t go unnoticed by Woojin though.

“Did something happen yesterday?” Woojin asks, settling down next to Jihoon in the café with two cups of hot chocolate in his hands.

“What?” Jihoon replies. “What could have happened?”

Donghan frowns, “Woojin is right. You’re acting strange. I don’t know… you just feel weird today.”

His friends couldn’t be nearer to the truth. Truth is, Jihoon is frightened. He doesn’t know when Daniel is going to leave him again. Even though Daniel had assured Jihoon he was here to stay, the inner voices just keep creeping back into his brain. 

“You guys are the weird ones,” Jihoon rebuts. 

“Isn’t Daniel hyung coming today?” Woojin asks. It’s amazing how Daniel managed to fit himself in their tight friendship circle in just a few days.

Donghan shrugs. “Don’t think so. He didn’t say anything either.”

Jihoon knows that Daniel isn’t coming today; he’s staying home to help his family with the Christmas preparations. He doesn’t say that though, it’s too weird for him to know about Daniel’s whereabouts when they’re supposed to be something a little less than friends.

“Whatever,” Woojin says, standing up. “Let’s go.”

They go skiing that day, and all Jihoon can think about is how nice it would be if Daniel were here with him.

 

_20 December_

 

Daniel knocks on his bedroom door that morning, but Jihoon doesn’t hear it. He’s too deep in sleep to know that a certain someone has entered his room.

Jihoon does feel someone pinching his left cheek though, but thinks it’s his sister playing a prank on him and swats the arm away, mumbling something along the lines of, “Leave me alone, I want to sleep.”

He only fully wakes up when he feels a large body pressed on top of his own and two arms straddling his waist.

“What-“

“Good morning, sleepy-head,” Daniel’s voice comes from on top of him.

“What are you doing in my room?” Jihoon panics, but he can’t move because Daniel has him pinned down good. “Get off me.”

“I came to ask you out for a date, then your parents realised you weren’t awake. And they let me into your room.”

Jihoon groans, of course his parents would.

“I don’t want to,” Jihoon protests, “I want to sleep.”

“We can sleep together.”

Jihoon turns his head to shoot Daniel a pointed glare.

“Not like that!” 

“You’re suffocating me. Move,” Jihoon commands and Daniel rolls off to the side of his bed, fitting perfectly in between Jihoon’s body and the wall. “I should lock my door next time.”

In the end, Jihoon falls asleep again. Daniel does too, because the next time Jihoon wakes up it’s because of Daniel’s loud snores filling his room. 

Jihoon wakes Daniel up lightly like he used to. When Daniel’s eyes flutter open, he asks, “Yes, babe?”

“Shut up. I can’t sleep. The next time you snore I’m chasing you out.”

Daniel only responds with a low hum and pulls Jihoon closer to him such that his back is lying directly against Daniel’s chest.

If anyone else enters and sees Jihoon being spooned by Daniel, he doesn’t hear it.

 

_21 December_

 

Woojin attacks Jihoon as soon as Daniel leaves to get him a cup of hot chocolate. 

“What the f-“ Jihoon’s mouth is covered by Donghan’s hand, and his friend whispers in a threatening voice, “Don’t you are make a sound.”

“Now,” Woojin says. “Tell me what’s going on between you and Daniel hyung.”

“Speak!” Donghan commands.

“Uh… I don’t think Jihoon hyung can talk if you’re covering his mouth,” Jinyoung offers. Woojin and Donghan exchange pointed glances.

“Yuck!” Donghan draws back his hand immediately. “He licked me!” 

Jihoon sticks his tongue out at his friend, “You deserve it! What are you all on about?”

Jinyoung sighs and pushes Woojin and Donghan aside, “There’s something between you and Daniel hyung, isn’t there? Spill.”

“T-there’s nothing-“

“Cut the crap,” Woojin interrupts. “He literally called you babe in front of all of us! I almost puked, by the way. And he put his hand over yours. Oh my god, Donghan, tell him I’m not hallucinating.”

“He’s not hallucinating,” Donghan confirms. “I saw that too.”

“Hyung…” Jinyoung cuts in. “Are you two dating?”

“We are not!” Jihoon protests a little too loudly and draws the unwanted attention of the other people standing around them. He then lowers his voice and says, “Yet.”

“Yet?” his three friends chorus simultaneously. Woojin’s jaw hangs open dumbly, and Donghan clutches his chest dramatically. Only Jinyoung looks normal; but god knows what that boy is really thinking all the time.

“Oh my god oh my god,” Woojin mumbles as he paces around Jihoon impatiently.

This isn’t how Jihoon had planned for his friends to find out. So much for keeping it lowkey, Jihoon thinks. He doesn’t know where to start explaining from. Should he start from 3 years ago?

Before his friends can press him for any more information, Daniel returns with two cups of hot chocolate in his hand. 

“Thank you,” Jihoon smiles gratefully, his hands warmed when he holds the cup.

“Sure,” Daniel says, squeezing Jihoon’s shoulder.

And he really wonders how they could ever keep this lowkey.

 

_22 December_

 

4 days to Christmas. Three years ago, this had how it all began. 

The high school seniors were graduating, and Jihoon had been invited by another senior (whom he’d lost touch with ever since) to their graduation party.

Donghan, Woojin and Jinyoung all knew – that Jihoon had a mega huge crush on Daniel ever since he’d danced at one of their school’s festivals. 

Crushes were called crushes because you were never meant to end up with them and your heart would get crushed in the end. 

Jihoon’s heart did get crushed – just in a different way.

Jihoon only attended the party with the hopes of seeing Daniel there. After he graduated, Jihoon would probably never get to see him again. They had no mutual friends, and Jihoon never had the guts to go up and talk to Daniel.

He went without the knowledge of his three friends, knowing how they’d probably force Jihoon into talking to Daniel.

So there he was, standing around awkwardly with a cup of alcohol in his hands and making small talk with faces he barely recognised. 

As fate would have it, Daniel brushed past Jihoon, causing him to spill his drink over himself.

“Oh my god, I am so sorry,” Daniel apologized profusely while he ran around trying to retrieve paper towels to wipe it off Jihoon’s shirt. Daniel, being the mega nice boy that he was, insisted on taking care of Jihoon the entire night after that.

(Not that he needed any taking care of, but Jihoon gladly agreed.)

It only took a few cups of beer for Daniel to finally confess that he was as infatuated with Jihoon as Jihoon was with him; he just never had the nerve to go up and talk to Jihoon.

“That’s so weird,” Jihoon chuckles. “I felt the exact same way.”

“Let’s not waste any more time,” Daniel says, before leaning into Jihoon for a kiss.

If Jihoon could change one thing about that first night three years ago, he would have wanted Daniel to come clean right there and then. He would have wanted Daniel to tell him that he was going to leave. 

Maybe then he would never have been so heart-broken.

 

“Hey,” Daniel greets Jihoon cheerfully at his doorstep, leaning in to ruffle Jihoon’s hair. He then notices the scarf that Jihoon is wearing, and a huge smile starts to spread across his lips. “I like your scarf.”

“I like it too,” Jihoon says.

This time, it’s no accident that he’s wearing the Gryffindor scarf out. It was a gift from Daniel from three years ago, after finding out that Daniel was weirdly infatuated with the Harry Potter series. 

“Where are we going today?” Daniel asks, linking his arms with Jihoon’s.

“I have to go shopping for Woojin’s Secret Santa present,” Jihoon explains. “Our exchange is in four days.”

“What about my present?” Daniel pouts.

“I am your present,” Jihoon says without missing a beat. 

“Merry Christmas to me,” Daniel sing-songs, bringing another smile to Jihoon’s face.

Jihoon ends up getting a shirt that says, “Santa’s Baby” for Woojin and thinks that it’s weirdly appropriate for his best friend. Their Secret Santa exchanges have never been serious, anyway. He’s sure one of the guys have gotten him an equally embarrassing present. 

“My boyfriend is strange,” Daniel mumbles under his breath.

Jihoon stops in his tracks. “Who said I was your boyfriend?”

Daniel rolls his eyes, “Okay, maybe not now. Probably later, but back then, you were still my boy-“

“It doesn’t count. It was barely four days.”

It comes out colder than Jihoon plans for it to, and he sees the hurt register on Daniel’s face and wishes he could eat his words.

“Hey, that four days meant everything to me.”

Then why did you leave?

“Okay, drop it. I don’t want to talk about it,” Jihoon sighs. Daniel doesn’t argue back either, not wanting to spoil the mood.

They still have so many things to talk about, so many misunderstandings to clear, and so many more lines to draw. But those can wait.

 

_23 December_

 

Much to Jihoon’s delight and surprise, the Daniel from three years ago doesn’t leave him hanging like he thought the other boy would. 

(He knows there are rumours circulating in their school that Daniel is a fuckboy.)

But Daniel does the exact opposite of what a fuckboy would do – that is, take Jihoon out on the date the first thing next morning. He even does the whole introduction to Jihoon’s parents thing; and that is when Jihoon’s parents fall in love with Kang Daniel as well.

His mother likes him because he’s a sweet, polite and thoughtful boy.

His father likes him because he knows how to carry a conversation, and he’s pretty funny too.

His sister absolutely adores Daniel because well…

“He’s so handsome,” Jina gushes, “Is he your boyfriend?”

Jihoon turns red as Daniel erupts into loud laughter. Jihoon ushers Daniel out the door before he gets bombarded with too many embarrassing questions from his family.

“Stay for dinner tonight,” Jihoon’s mother offers.

Daniel looks to Jihoon for affirmation. Jihoon would love for Daniel to stay for dinner, actually.

“That would be an honour,” Daniel accepts the invitation gratefully.

Once outside, Jihoon says, “You didn’t have to come here.”

Daniel pulls Jihoon closer to him and slips a heat pack into Jihoon’s hands. 

“I told you, I’m serious about you.”

 

“Earth to Jihoon,” Daniel taps on his shoulder and Jihoon reverts back to reality. They’re cuddled together on Jihoon’s bed, and are watching the third edition to the Harry Potter series together. Maybe it’s the fourth, Jihoon can’t keep track.

“Hm?” Jihoon hums, choosing to rest his head on Daniel’s shoulder and feels his eyes closing.

“You can’t be sleeping right now,” Daniel protests. “The best part is about to happen!”

Jihoon forces his eyes to open – when Daniel says that the climax of the movie is approaching, he really means that the main characters are probably about to point their wands at the villains again and mutter spells under their breath.

“What is this?” Jihoon notices something different about Daniel.

He carefully touches the rim of Daniel’s circled glasses and sighs, “They don’t even have lenses in them.”

“You don’t like it?” Daniel prompts. “I got these just to look like Harry Potter.”

“It’s nice,” Jihoon agrees. “You are more handsome than Harry Potter, you don’t need them.”

Daniel smiles, his two front teeth showing so obviously. 

Suddenly, he turns over and hugs Jihoon’s waist lovingly. Daniel tries leaning in for a kiss, but Jihoon stops him immediately. For a moment, Daniel looks confused. Then, he sees the fear in Jihoon’s eyes.

“You still haven’t completely forgiven me,” Daniel states.

“How can I?” Jihoon admits. “I’m scared that you’ll leave me again.”

“I’m not going anywhere,” Daniel insists, his grip tightening.

“Okay,” Jihoon sighs, running his fingers through Daniel’s soft hair. 

“You still don’t believe me,” Daniel says, but his voice is muffled.

Jihoon stays silent. 

“It’s okay, I’ll show you.”

 

_24 December_

 

Christmas Eve. Three years ago, Jihoon and Daniel spent the Eve of Christmas like any other teenagers. They made snow angels and snowmen.

“Let’s do that thing again,” Daniel says when Jihoon meets him the morning of the Eve three years later. When Jihoon looks at him strangely, he elaborates, “I want to make snow angels with you.”

“But it’s freezing,” Jihoon says, rubbing his gloves together as proof. 

Without a second thought, Daniel reaches into his pocket and takes out two hot packs. He then reaches over to cup Jihoon’s cheeks with his two hands. 

“That feels nice,” Jihoon says, the warmth of the hot packs making him smile. “Keep it there.”

“Yes, princess,” Daniel groans, but continues to hold the hot packs to Jihoon’s face anyway. 

After what seems like forever, Jihoon takes Daniel’s hands off him, “Okay. Let’s make snow angels now.”

“Really?” Daniel says, shoving the hot packs into Jihoon’s pockets and cheers excitedly. Kang Daniel resembles a huge dog when he’s excited, even more so with the large padding coat he’s wearing to keep himself warm. 

“Yay!” Daniel cheers and easily lifts Jihoon off the ground into his arms.

Jihoon instinctively wraps his arms around Daniel’s neck – he doesn’t want to die today. 

“Put me down now,” Jihoon says, eyeing Daniel nervously. 

“Not unless you give me a kiss,” Daniel jokes around, placing his face closer to Jihoon’s lips. Jihoon doesn’t give in, and chooses to push Daniel’s face away instead.

“You asked for it,” Daniel warns, and before Jihoon can ask him what exactly he means by that, he’s flung onto a smile of soft snow. It doesn’t hurt the least bit; but Jihoon puts on a show by pretending that he’s hurt his back.

Daniel, being the ever innocent boy, falls for it. His smile disappears immediately and he kneels down next to Jihoon, “Holy shit, are you okay? I’m so sorry-“

When Daniel gets close enough, Jihoon wraps Daniel’s head in a headlock around his legs, causing Daniel to fall over and tap his leg impatiently as a sign to let him go.

However, Jihoon doesn’t feel merciful today. He tugs harder on Daniel’s hand, making him squirm under his grip even harder.

“Let me go, asshole!” Daniel groans from in between Jihoon’s legs.

Finally, Jihoon lets Daniel go, now breathless and feeling a little warm.

“Damn, what did you do these three years to get this strong?” Daniel says, holding a hand to his chest.

Jihoon shrugs, “It might have been me joining the soccer team.”

“You joined a soccer team?” Daniel gasps. “Why did you never tell me this?”

“You never asked,” Jihoon replies. 

Truth is, there are a lot of things about Jihoon that has changed in the span of three years, it’s just that Daniel hasn’t discovered all of them yet. 

“I don’t want to make snow angels anymore,” Daniel pouts, “Especially not with a devil like you.”

“That’s fine by me,” Jihoon says, standing up and dusting the snow off his coat, making sure that some of them ‘accidentally’ land on Daniel.

What he doesn’t see is Daniel secretly gathering a pile of snow in his hands. 

“Shall we go?” Jihoon smiles, thinking he’s won the battle this time. 

“Yeah, hold on,” Daniel pretends to fiddle with his coat and without warning, launches a snowball into Jihoon’s face. 

Daniel holds his breath as he waits for Jihoon to react. Jihoon is dangerously silent. Daniel starts to think that maybe he should have kept his hands to himself that time.

As the snow pieces begin to fall off Jihoon’s face pathetically, Daniel reaches over to help Jihoon brush the snow off in hopes that he’s not going to get into any trouble.

“I’m going to kill you,” he hears Jihoon mutter.

 

 

After an intense snowball fight ending with Jihoon burying Daniel in snow, the sun is already starting to set and Jihoon has to get home before his relatives make their appearance. As much as his parents adore Daniel, they’re not going to be happy if it means Jihoon being late to a family dinner.

“I’ll see you tomorrow?” Daniel asks when the near Jihoon’s house.

“I don’t know. I’m going over to Donghan’s in the afternoon for our gift exchange,” Jihoon says. “And maybe… maybe you could come over my dinner? My parents have been pestering me non-stop to have you over for dinner.”

“That sounds lovely,” Daniel agrees immediately. “Tell your dad I’ll bring the alcohol.”

Jihoon knows his parents stand no chance against Kang Daniel – especially when he knows what each of them like, and never fills to exceed their expectations.

“See you tomorrow, then,” Daniel says as he waits for Jihoon to go inside before he leaves, like he always does. 

Jihoon thinks he hears Daniel say something along the lines of ‘I love you’, but the wind carries his words away. He doesn’t think he has the courage to say it back just yet, so he just turns and waves Daniel goodbye one last time.

 

 

_25 December_

 

“Merry Christmas!” Donghan practically jumps at Jihoon when he rings his friend’s doorbell the next day. He’s the last one there, but that isn’t the thing that bothers him the most.

“What are you supposed to be?” Jihoon says, side-eyeing Woojin’s ‘costume’.

“Just trying to get into the mood,” Woojin says, already exasperated that this is the third time he has to explain his choice of fashion. His friend is in a Santa suit, he doesn’t even forget the beard.

“Wow,” Jihoon says sarcastically, absolutely no sign of amusement in his tone. “Looks like I got you the right present, then.”

“Oh my god, you’re not supposed to reveal it now!” Woojin screeches, hurting Jihoon’s ears. In fact, if Jihoon goes deaf one day, he’s sure it’s Woojin’s fault.

“Oops.”

“Christmas is cancelled,” Donghan announces as he slumps onto his couch.

“Does this mean I can leave now?” Jinyoung asks.

“No! We’re all going to sing Christmas carols and be fucking merry and make friendship bracelets for each other. I hate you all,” Donghan says spitefully, earning himself a scolding from his mother for ‘the use of such coarse language’.

They exchange their gifts. It turns out that Woojin and Jihoon are each other’s Secret Santas, which is the perfect conclusion to their exchange, because the only people that have taken this seriously is Donghan and Jinyoung.

In response to Jihoon’s suggestive shirt for Woojin, Woojin has gotten him a robotic Santa that says, “Park Jihoon is a fucking idiot” whenever the button on his belly is pushed.

Jinyoung got a year’s supply of socks for Donghan, and Donghan got a brand-new hoodie for Jinyoung, to which Jihoon and Woojin agreed their friends were boring as hell.

Lunch goes exceptionally well, because Donghan’s mother cooks a kickass turkey. They then berate the lyrics to all the Christmas carols they know and Jihoon makes sure to videotape Woojin dancing to the Mean Girls version of ‘Jingle Bell Rock.”

Before he knows it, they’re all passed out on Donghan’s living room floor. Jihoon just barely manages to pick himself off the floor and head for the door.

“Where are you going?” Donghan asks in his half-awake state.

“Last minute Christmas shopping,” Jihoon explains. 

Donghan hums, and Jihoon hears his friend getting up to show him out. 

“Bye, asshole. Merry Christmas again,” Donghan says, to which Jihoon responds by showing Donghan a kissy face and gets swatted away. “You’re disgusting. Please leave.”

 

Jihoon wasn’t lying when he said he had to do very last-minute Christmas shopping. He didn’t know how it slipped his mind, but in the mess of berating the lyrics to “All I Want for Christmas is You”, Jihoon realises that he hasn’t gotten a present for Daniel.

Immediately, he heads to the nearby clothing shop.

If it weren’t cringey to have matching scarfs, Jihoon would have gotten Daniel the exact same Gryffindor scarf, just because the boy was so proud for being sorted into the Gryffindor house in every single internet test he’d taken.

But it’s cringey, so Jihoon decides against it.

Instead, he picks out a nice brown scarf that he thinks would suit Daniel well and chooses to have Daniel’s initials embroidered on the end. He then packs the scarf into a pretty bag and heads home to help his mother with the Christmas cooking.

 

As the time for dinner approaches, Jihoon can feel his mother start to get jittery. It’s a mom thing, Jihoon thinks.

Thing is, everything is going well. Mothers just worry too much.

“I hope Daniel still likes my roast beef,” his mother mutters to herself. “He used to love it so much.”

It was true, Daniel had polished off their roast beef three years ago, leaving Jihoon’s mothers all smiles for the rest of the night.

“Mom,” Jihoon sighs. “Daniel eats anything and everything. You know that.”

“You’re right,” his mother lets out a huge sigh.

As if on cue, there’s two knocks on the door and Jihoon runs to answer it. There stands Daniel, with some snowflakes still stuck in between the curls of his hair. Jihoon tiptoes to brush it off, to which Daniel responds with a quick hug before he rushes in to greet Jihoon’s parents.

“Merry Christmas, Mr and Mrs Park!” Daniel says, giving each of Jihoon’s parents a big hug. 

“And of course, my favourite Jina,” Daniel doesn’t forget to ruffle Jina’s hair and even says, “You look very pretty today!”

“Come, sit down,” Jihoon’s mother says, showing him to a seat at their table.

“Something smells amazing,” Daniel comments. He turns to grin at Jihoon’s mother, “Is it the famous roast beef?”

The smile on his mother’s face already tells Jihoon that the game is over. His family is completely sold over the idea of Kang Daniel. Not that he minds, though.

Daniel brings out the alcohol – which puts his father in a good mood for the rest of the night. They have a dinner full of stuffed faces and stomachs. His parents ask Daniel about what he’s been doing, and Daniel asks about how their work is going.

It isn’t long before the end of dinner, and Daniel fishes out three bags from behind the sofa.

“I got you gifts,” Daniel says, “I really hope you like them.”

He hands a bag to Jihoon’s mother, father and Jina and waits expectantly for all of them to open their gifts. Jihoon’s mother receives a set of scented candles, and his father receives a bottle of nicely aged wine. Jina receives a walking toy dog, and starts playing excitedly immediately.

“That’s very nice and all, but don’t I get one as well?” Jihoon asks, crossing his arms.

“I am your present,” Daniel smiles sweetly, throwing Jihoon’s words back at him.

Daniel volunteers to help out with the dishes, and meets Jihoon in his room right after.

“Take a shower if you’re sleeping over,” Jihoon says, throwing a towel to Daniel’s hands. Daniel doesn’t say anything, and instead shifts uncomfortably in his position.

“What?” Jihoon asks curiously. He notices Daniel’s hands behind his back. “What are you hiding from me?”

Daniel smiles sheepishly, “I might have actually gotten you a present?”

Jihoon grins, “I knew you did. Show me!”

Again, Daniel hesitates, and only moves closer to Jihoon but doesn’t take his hands out from behind his back. Slowly, but surely, Daniel takes his hands out to reveal a small flower in his hands.

A mistletoe.

“Merry Christmas?” Daniel attempts.

Jihoon feels his cheeks turn red. “It doesn’t work if you bring the mistletoe into the room yourself-“

“It’s not like we haven’t done it before,” Daniel reasons.

And he’s right. They’ve done it way too many times – and Jihoon misses it so much.

“I- I know. It’s just been three years-“

“It’s fine if you don’t want to,” Daniel forces a smile and shoves the flower behind his back again, although Jihoon can tell he’s visibly disappointed. “I’ll go take a shower, okay?”

Through the three years, Jihoon has learnt to only hate Kang Daniel. He’d hated Daniel for leaving him so easily without even a goodbye. He’d hated Daniel for not even bothering to text or call him once.

Then, as if it were a Christmas miracle, Daniel came back.

He’d came back stronger, more in love with Jihoon than ever. And Jihoon isn’t going to throw it away so easily again.

“Come back here, stupid,” Jihoon says, grabbing onto Daniel’s arm and swiftly closing the distance between their bodies. “What I wanted to say is; you don’t need to have a mistletoe for me to kiss you.”

With that, he kisses Daniel. Daniel tastes sweet, just like how he’d remembered from three years ago. And Daniel kisses him back too, exactly the way he’d used to back then. The kiss is only broken when Jihoon feels Daniel smiling against his lips and he pulls away.

“You ruined it this time,” Jihoon chides, pulling away. “Now go take a shower.”

“Gladly,” Daniel says, pressing a light kiss on Jihoon’s forehead before disappearing into the bathroom.

 

The night of Christmas feels all too familiar to Jihoon. Three years ago, Daniel and him were in the exact same position on his bed. Jihoon playing with Daniel’s hand and Daniel playing with Jihoon’s hair while they talked about anything under the sky.

“I’m really sorry about back then,” Daniel finally says. “I was too scared to tell you that I had to leave Korea to attend college overseas. I was worried you’d look for someone else.”

“That’s not a good enough reason for you to cut me off from your life completely,” Jihoon sighs.

Somehow, he’s willing to let everything go. They were young, and they’d made many stupid mistakes. Jihoon used to think that he was a stupid mistake that Daniel had made. But seeing how Daniel had come back for him, he was starting to change his mind.

“I know,” Daniel replies, burying his face into Jihoon’s neck. “I’ll never, ever, do that again.”

“That tickles,” Jihoon says, pushing Daniel away. “Okay. I believe you.”

“God, I love you so much,” Daniel confesses. Jihoon is thankful that the lights are turned off because he’s sure his face is as red as a tomato right now.

“It’s Jihoon to you,” Jihoon jokes.

That alone lands Jihoon a fury of kisses from Daniel, until he has to distance himself for Daniel to stop.

“Promise you’ll still be here in the morning?” Jihoon says into the darkness.

Daniel squeezes his hand under the blankets.

“I promise.”

 

_26 December_

 

Jihoon wakes up and immediately reaches over to feel the other side of his bed like he’s done everyday for the past three years. 

_It’s empty._

At first, Jihoon thinks it’s a dream. Another nightmare. 

He clearly remembers hugging Daniel to sleep last night, and he remembers Daniel promising him that he’s going to be here when he wakes up. 

Then why is his bed empty?

Jihoon’s fingers clench together in a fist and he feels the tears welling up in his eyes. This is the exact situation he’s been in three years ago. He realises that he’s fallen all too well for Daniel’s lies again, and buries his face into the pillow.

His tears know no end, and he doesn’t even hear his bedroom door opening until someone taps him on the shoulder.

“Jihoon?”

It’s Daniel’s voice, and Jihoon turns over immediately. There stands Daniel, in the same shirt he’d worn to sleep last night. 

“Where did you go?” Jihoon yells, his face stained with tears, but he doesn’t care.

“Y-your mom said you liked having breakfast in bed, so I went to get it for you…” Daniel explains, flustered to see Jihoon’s pillow drenched in tears.

That’s when Jihoon spots the tray of food at the door of his room. He wipes his tears away with his arm. 

“You’re not leaving?” he sniffs.

“No, dummy,” Daniel says, helping Jihoon wipe his tears away as well. He then wraps Jihoon into a tight hug and pats his back gently to comfort him as he would to a baby. “I’m here, I’m sorry. I swear I only left for 5 minutes to get your breakfast-“

“Shut up,” Jihoon says. “I really hate you.”

He can’t help but be happy though. History isn’t going to repeat itself. 

A day after Christmas three years ago, Jihoon woke up to an empty bed.

Three years later on the same day, Jihoon makes sure to wake up to the person he loves.

Daniel’s smile softens and pinches Jihoon’s cheek.

 

“You still like your eggs runny?”

“And my juice in a glass.”

 

This Christmas, Jihoon is going to make sure they last more than four days. 

 

“Is the mistletoe still valid after Christmas?”

“It’s not a gift voucher, it doesn’t have an expiry dat-“

 

Jihoon doesn’t have time to complete his sentence before Daniel pushes his back onto the bed and kisses him senseless, neither caring about their morning breath.


End file.
